Beer fest (CA homebrew festival) is happening this weekend. That was the big camping festival where I got really drunk and started telling my friends I was an atheist. Sunday of beer fest is when I cam home and told my wife.
One year ago tonight.
I was supposed to go this year too but finances prohibited it. It’s hard to get a grasp on commission and how to live consistently when your pay check balloons and shrinks more than the stock market or a teenagers emotions.
I am finally becoming more successful and stable at work! April and March I placed second in the company for RMR (recurring monthly revenue “contracts”) sales. With how I performed in March, I thought for sure I would be able to go to beer fest. But when Jenn and I broke down the numbers, every dollar…every…single…dollar…was already spoken for. The largest paycheck in my life needed to pay off all the bills I couldn’t pay over the last few month. And I needed to put up some serious numbers in April to have a chance to breathe in May. The last 2 days of the month, when I was supposed to be at beer fest, I ended up securing nearly double my quota. I think that means I’ll be able to put some money aside in savings finally, and be more prepared for low sales months.
If you’re friends with me on Facebook, you’ve seen me become more and more open about my lack of belief. I even one time used the “A” word. Most people didn’t recoil. In fact people are starting to come of their shell and ask me questions.
If you saw the one post were I reached out to others and told them loss of faith wasn’t their fault, it was about time I received a wave of questions from Christian. Most of them were curious, some were heart broken. None were accusatory. Though I did loose about 10 “friends” due to that post.
In the wake of that, I made some videos. Videos intended to be seen by former church members who were asking me questions. They aren’t terribly well produced videos, but I was going for authenticity. I wanted them to see these videos as me just having a conversation with them.
But I chickend out. I never published them. Or rather, I haven’t published them yet. I think people in my community are fine with me not believing, but I don’t want to come out and be seen as an enemy of the church trying to dismantle the faith. That would have serious financial repercussions. I will publish these videos to Facebook, I just don’t know when. But for now, I’ll share them with you. And you can share these videos if you like. If you think they may help someone.