Father’s Day Part 1

Called my dad and told him I was looking for a new job.  He’s an atheist by the way.

Me: Happy father’s day dad.

Dad: Hey, to you too son.

General chit chat about life.

Me: So I put my resume in for one of the local breweries

Dad’s actually an avid homebrewer

Dad: Really? So you are thinking of moving on from church work?

Me: Well yeah, you know…

Dad: Why’s that?

Me: Well, umm…It’s a strange industry and if I’m going to start over I better do it soon.

I couldn’t bring myself to tell my dad that I stopped believing, which is strange.  He’s an atheist, I think he would be very supportive.  I’m not sure why I feel like it would be a disappointment for him, or maybe I just don’t want to let him know he was right.  It’s complicated

Dad: Well you’re right about that.  I’m glad that you are keep your career options open.  So what were you hoping to do at the brewery?

Me: Originally I put in for sales, but they didn’t have a sales position open.  However the owner got back to me and said there was a position open for a brewer.

Dad: Yeah but son, any entry level position in the brewery is just going to be a laborer.  That’s often minimum wage work.  You can’t live on that.

He really could be right about that.  I’m still waiting to hear back from the owner so we could talk about salary.

Me: Yeah, but this guy is in the middle of expanding.  They just opened a second location, they bottling more, and the growing pretty strong.  I’m hoping to position myself to grow with them.

Dad: Listen, you’ve certainly got the personality for sales. I think that’s a smart move, but I’m not sure you want to be laborer for the next 5 years making $13/hr.  That does nothing for your family son.

Dad is typically frustratingly right, but I feel stuck.  I can’t seem to find any job that makes over $35k.  I’m considering the two jobs option.  But that gives me no motivation to leave the church in any hurry.




8 thoughts on “Father’s Day Part 1

  1. OK, how’s this (*) for a plan:

    1) You don’t need to leave your church job to start in this place. You could:
    a) Ask the boss for compatible hours during a pre-determined trial period. That keep both your options (you and the boss) open, makes it easier for both of you to walk back your agreement yet it lets you test drive the job and vice versa

    b) If (a) works or not, once you got your bearing, ask the boss what market they would like to penetrate next and what gals they have in that regard. Every company wants to sell more widgets. Smart companies know that selling A LOT more can be dangerous. Quality may go down, expenses may go up for longer than the cash will last (I know this first hand, when I got an order for 50K Christmas ornaments we all celebrated, then the reality of having to buy 50K little boxes, 10K larger boxes, print UPC codes and all the other stuff involved at least 5 months before we would see dollan 1 downed on us and that was actually the beginning of the end for our company. We had to borrow at high % and once you get into that (called “Factoring” ) it’s like heroin or crack for a business. You end up spending your profits in order to keep the doors open).
    So be careful with that, but if the boss is aware of a market he needs to tap, volunteer to do it for him. See if he can give you some latitude in pricing, special offers and so on. Maybe come up with a printed poster for the new market bars so they can advertise the beer and so on.

    Don’t do the above until you are confident your help is needed and appreciated. In the meantime, learn the craft and keep going with the sermons. Don’t forget you are still an important part of your congregation. You may not be able to believe the magic that goes with your religion, but I am positive that 90% of what you do is actually real. Even telling your parishioners (if that term correct in your case?) to pray is not useless as long as they use prayer as a way to think about their problems and find a way to solve it.

    How is the prospect of a second job as far as pastors are concerned? A job in a brewery could be the perfect part-time cover for you because it can also be explained away as a hobby. As in “sure, I am working for minimum wage but I am learning about something I find fun and interesting.”
    Should anyone find out, it would be a lot easier to justify than a job at a tire dealership. Say out loud “I always loved tires and PSI and it is my hobby” not very convincing, is it?

    BEER! Much more convincing (I can’t drink because of my Hepatitis C. I suffer through every beer commercial they show on tv, even though I know the liquid in the glass is likely Motor Oil and shaving cream, it looks all so f%#*^ng good).

    I really think this could be a turning point for you with a bit of luck and a lot of hard work and initiative.
    Of course, the odds are against you. There could be a thousands reasons why your scheme may not work, but you won’t know if you don’t try.
    Always try to make it as inexpensive as possible for the brewery. Always be aware of protecting the company name so that if this is not a good time to sell your products in a certain market, you can try again later. Think of everything you can. Printing, online ads, POS (Point Of Sale) promotions, etc.

    Also, make sure your own interests are taken care of. That means negotiating beforehand a fair and reasonable commission. If this company has not established a system yet, google what is customary in the industry.

    I’d say go for it. If you need more help let me know. If you want some direct coaching (no guarantees of success, but you get the benefit of another brain working at the issue) let me know and I’ll contact you with my email.

    Also, tell your Dad what you are going through. If you were my son I’d want to know.

    (*) Obviously, I am pulling this out of my ass. You don’t know much about this job to begin with, so I know even less and I know nothing about the brewery business. Caveat emptor.


  2. Hey there pastornofaith, I just recently found your blog. Your post today prompted me to comment. You mentioned not being able or ready to tell your dad about “no longer believing”. My experience is perhaps flip-flopped because my oldest son left the faith first. But also, I wanted to share that my grandfather raised me (I called him Dad). He was agnostic but I was a Christian fundamentalist for over 30 years, starting in my early teens. My dad passed away several years ago before my deconversion and now I wish I had gotten the chance to tell him that I no longer believed the myths and fables. He would have been happy to hear it — I’m certain.

    On the flip side, my oldest son’s loss of faith when he was about 21 was a devastating event for me but it started me on my journey that lasted about 7 years, ending with my abandonment of the Christian faith. Not longer after my deconversion, I let my son know that I was grateful for his courage and grateful that his embracement of evidence-based-reality helped me get there as well. (You can read it at http://lifeafter40.net – Under About Us, if interested). But again, I was glad I got to tell my son.

    I hope for all the best in your future! I can’t imagine what its been like.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve heard that many times before and always wished it were true. My father, the Sunday School teacher, was mean, violent, and bigoted. He never improved, and we were forever estranged. And that’s sad because few of us ever have a relationship that matters more to us, but when he’s a monster (who has the community fooled), it’s best to admit it and not whitewash it. Then, do your best to not follow his example.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Like others have mentioned, you don’t need to be in any hurry to leave the church. After all, that’s what you’re trained for. Do car salesmen have to believe in the products they sell? You can always try to help your flock begin to think for themselves. I wonder how many current ministers and preachers actually believe what they preach.
    John W Loftus, a former student of William Lane Craig, has turned to writing books. Thanks to your Bible training, you probably have lots of ideas worth publishing. Loftus is celebrating his sixth book in six years. And don’t forget Bart Ehrman. Somehow he manages to stay employed. John Loftus may have some helpful hints on leaving the Church.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. its interesting watching your journey. hope your job search works out well for you, but i have to ask…so, was your dad an atheist since you were a kid?

    Liked by 1 person

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